2/27/23
Have you ever heard the saying, “Do as I say, not as I do?” If you said yes, then I think you’re like most people. We’re not really hypocrites. We just occasionally say we’re going to do something we won’t actually do. But that’s not Donna. She lets you know exactly what she plans to do, and then she executes that plan. What a thoroughly refreshing, straightforward, enlightened, beautiful, sassy attitude. But it can be so annoying.
I say that because being married to such a doer like Donna means that I’m going to be pulled into most of her capers, whether I want to be or not. She’s like Batman and I’m Robin. Have you ever heard Robin say no to Batman? No, because if he did, he’d be kicked out of the Batcave. So, I tend to go along with her plans, even when I see trouble ahead. For example, when we first moved into the neighborhood, these oddball neighbors invited us over. But instead of telling Donna I thought it was a bad idea, I said okay.
Sure enough, after they ushered us into their home, they proceeded to carry on a shouting dialogue with someone in another room. Not once did they explain to us who they were talking to. It was like they were talking to a ghost only they could hear.
Fast forward to yesterday. When Donna told me that she wanted to walk down the street and meet our new neighbors, I was a little hesitant. Why force the issue? Why not wait until we run into them? But I made no effort to dampen Donna’s urges to be social.
As we neared the house though, and we saw one of the new neighbors in the front yard, I worried about what Donna might say. I quickly whispered to her, “Now, don’t let them think we’re coming over to be nosy.”
She passed me a look that said, “I got this—leave it to me.” Then she promptly hailed our neighbor with a big hello and said, “We’re your neighbors. We’re coming over to be nosy.”
I tugged on her sleeve as she doubled down on her greeting and added, “He didn’t want me to say that. But why shouldn’t we be up front with you?”
That’s about as subtle as Donna gets.
But instead of being insulted, the man beamed like he’d made a new friend at the playground and said, “Thanks! I appreciate that.”
Most people find Donna’s candidness delightful, but I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to it. I think it’s because our personalities are so different. According to Psychology Today, only about 18% of the population (people like Donna) score high on the assertiveness scale and deal with things head on. These people thrive on conflict. They will say what they think, don’t care who they offend, and are bold in their approach. Donna says what she means and means what she says. The remaining 82% of the population (people like me) tends to shrink away from conflict, would prefer not to address things, and tolerates bad behavior like yelling and cursing.
As it turned out, our neighbor was from New York, so he and Donna hit it off right away, probably because they were both very direct communicators. Within minutes they were openly complaining about the entire neighborhood. I couldn’t believe how quickly they trusted each other.
But I shouldn’t have been surprised. Getting people to open up to her is one of the reasons Donna is such a great realtor. Another reason is because she has a helper like me, a helper who’s not looking to move up in rank, a helper who’s happy to be her Robin.
What kind of personality do you have?
#RobinisnothingwithoutBatman
