Today is Definitely a Weird Day
4/19/24
I just got back from dropping Donna off at the airport. Normally, whenever we return home, the dogs will bark their heads off until Donna and I walk through the front door, but today only Sophie barked to greet me. She’s kind of an airhead, so I’m not surprised that she didn’t figure out the simple math: two people walked out the door, but only one came back.
Pete, on the other hand, didn’t even bother to move from his perch by the window. The message was clear. I wasn’t worth greeting unless Donna was with me. He was annoyed. He was sad. He was suspicious.
He sat in the middle of the carpet runner by the front door and stared at me. His eyes said it all.
“What have you done with her?”
Obviously, our habit of watching murder mystery shows has affected Pete. He’s watched enough of them with us to know that when the wife suddenly disappears, the husband is the number one suspect.
“I didn’t do anything to your mom,” I reassured Pete. “She’s just on a trip. She’ll be back soon.”
But Pete wasn’t buying it. He jumped back up to his seat by the window to investigate the situation. Maybe he was looking for blood stains. I don’t know. I sure hope he doesn’t know how to dial 911. Pete is very smart, so I bet he does.
I sympathize with Pete because I’m also feeling out of sorts without Donna. By the way, the expression “out of sorts” comes from the printing industry. In the old days, print shops stored their letter types in boxes called “sorts.” So, the letter “a” was in the a sort, the letter “b” was in the b sort, the letter “c” was in the c sort, etc. But sometimes the printer ran out of a letter in the middle of a job, which made them “out of sorts.”
Without Donna, our family unit definitely isn’t complete. I’m glad she’s going to have a good time at Naja’s baby shower, but her presence will be missed. Forget about that solar eclipse nonsense. Not having Donna around is a big deal!
Since we got married June 23, 2003, I haven’t slept without her by my side, except for three occasions:
- In the early days of our marriage, back when I had good health insurance, we attempted to address Donna’s sleep apnea problem (she wasn’t breathing properly at night). But the doctor couldn’t determine the severity of the problem unless she underwent overnight observation in a sleep clinic. No spouses allowed! Boy, that was a long night.
- Then there was that time when her father passed away. Donna dashed to NYC to help Ma with the funeral arrangements. I don’t remember being there for the administration part of it, just the funeral. So, I think we were parted for a day or two. Once again, the bed felt way too big.
- The last time we were parted for at least 24 hours was also for medical reasons. I don’t remember if it was when Donna almost passed out because her blood pressure was over 200 (the hospital may have kept her overnight to run tests) or if it was when she had spinal fusion surgery, but some hospital administrator had the nerve to say I couldn’t sleep in Donna’s hospital bed.
The point is that the dogs and I will be cuddling extra close tonight without Donna. Pete, no doubt, will be keeping an extra close eye on me. Who wants to sleep with a murderer?
#outofsorts
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